i don't want to sidetrack the post that got me thinking about this so i'll make my own: you don't deserve to suffer because you made mistakes.
did something self destructive? caused harm to yourself or others? put yourself in a bad situation?
that doesn't mean you deserve to suffer.
yes, even if you harmed other people. i don't believe that suffering is redemptive. by which i mean, i don't think anyone, including the person you have harmed, benefits from you suffering in return.
this is different from facing consequences for your actions. i believe that if someone harms another person, they should seek to rectify the situation if possible and make amends if not. what form that takes varies depending on the situation, but i don't think punishment helps anyone.
we know, for example, that prison, in addition to being inhumane, neither deters people from harming others in the first place (if they even did harm anyone, which does not apply to everyone in prison by any means), nor prevents them from doing it again.
this is probably basic prison abolitionist logic and I'm sure other people have said it better than me. but i saw someone comment in confusion about my statement "making mistakes doesn't mean you deserve to suffer" so i thought i'd expand on it.
this includes emotional suffering. marinating in guilt and shame doesn't help you, and if you harmed someone else, it doesn't help them either.
a certain amount of guilt can sometimes help a person realize they have done wrong, for example, but unless it's directly accomplishing something like that, i don't think it benefits anyone. sometimes you can't help it, i get that. you can't always just turn off guilt or shame, like any emotion. but if you can escape it, i hope you allow yourself that grace. while seeking to repair the harm.
in my personal experience, i have found it much easier to directly face my mistakes and bad decisions when i am not drowning in guilt. severe guilt distorts your perspective, and it can make facing up to your mistakes hurt so bad you may avoid it altogether.
if you can be kind to yourself even when you have done something genuinely bad, you'll actually be in a better position to course correct.
so ya boi has been super depressed, like clinically, for way longer than usual and it led to me heading down to the local psych urgent care for an evaluation today
During the eval, which was over zoom, the person assessing me asked me if I keep any "gods or ancestral gods" in the house.
I'm thinking "weird question for a psych eval, but okay sure", and I get about two sentences into describing my weird pagan ways before she leans into her screen and says "GUNS. Do you keep any G U N S or have ACCESS TO GUNS in the house."
so that's probably the funniest thing that's happened to me recently
wait THAT’S why my wife always says “son boy allowed” about our cat??
happy 5 years to son boy allowed
Everyone gets “The 90s” look wrong so let’s fix it
If you weren’t here for part one, lemme sum it up real fast:
Okay, all up to speed? We’re being served 80s throwback stuff with the serial numbers scratched off, re-labeled as yo totally 90s. What we’ve got now isn’t completely wrong, but I’m telling you, there’s so much gold left unmined.
As we saw in part one with Memphis Milano, these things get messy. Trends don’t start and end neatly every ten years. The first wave of 90s throwback attempts focused on the early part of the decade, and nobody since really pushed to represent the other seven years. Well, if you really wanna do something, I guess you gotta do it yourself.
I have suggestions. Get your flannel ready, we’ve got a lot of ground to cover.
anyway do you think dirk could use his lightning powers like a defibrillator
actually putting this in a reblog
